The other day, I got another taste of the dark side or shadow side of my spirituality. I wish I meant Darth Vader or some other ridiculous reference to Star Wars. I want to set the record straight about Spirituality, waking up and the decision to embark on a Spiritual path. This wasn’t my first experience with shadow and I am not here to freak you out or make you run for the hills. I want to share and educate and inform those of you who are called to this journey. I want you to know what it IS and what it isn’t. I wasn’t ready for it. That woman who inspired me to become a Medium and who called me out on that was bang on when she approached me and said it. I don’t want you to think you have to put a smile on your face even when it’s all going to shit.
Blogger’s note: I FREAKING love what I do. And this blog is my personal opinion and experiences.
Here are some things I have learned along the way:
- Positivity: Most of you believe that in order to be considered a “spiritual” being, you must be POSITIVE all the freaking time. This is actually false. I’m not sure where along the way someone decided it was meant to be this way, but in fact, it is quite the opposite. Bombarded with self-help books, the Law of Attraction phenomenon and misleading “inspirational” quotes that plaster your social media pages don’t exactly help us. We hear over and over that in order to wear the “I Am Spiritual” t-shirt, you must first walk around like everything in this world is sunshine and rainbows. Heaven forbid if you forget your daily affirmations or skip your meditation one day. Please go easy on you. You aren’t perfect and it’s exhausting trying and always being in fight or flight each moment of your day. Take a minute (or 30) and just sit with yourself. See what comes up. Close your eyes and breathe into it.
- It Isn’t all Light and Love: ROFL. I hate to be the one to break it to you (actually, I am happy to do it) but being spiritual isn’t all light. Spirituality involves some pretty fucking messy work on yourself and that includes looking at your shadows. Mediumship isn’t just about channelling your loved ones in spirit. (Which I fully admit I was NOT prepared for) It’s light AND dark. You can’t really have anything without both sides of the coin. Same goes for this. Light and dark. Ying and Yang. Up and Down. In and Out. Ok, now I’m just quoting Katy Perry. All spirits aren’t the good guys. Some are manipulative. It’s a learning curve and I’m getting better at recognizing it. I am thankful for my low-vibe energies experiences. They’ve brought me so many helpful people who have become Mentors and friends. Having support is key to this work.
- You WILL Need to Work on Yourself: Speaking of work, being on this planet requires us to show up and serve others in whatever capacity that is for you. Each of us WILL at some point, have this “holy shit” moment and start to question everything. Your “reality”, who you are, what you came here to do, your purpose, your beliefs and your relationships. None of it will make much sense to you one day, if it hasn’t happened already. For me, it was six years ago when my middle son decided to throw 1000 piece box of Lego across the room. Simple as that. It could be a tiny thing or a massive event that will change the course of your entire life. But can I tell you something? It will be SO worth it. You must go through it. You can’t keep stuffing it down until you’re 80. Do you want to be free? Then face the pain. Don’t shove it down anymore.
What is the definition of spirituality anyway:
To me, it means to constantly find ways to SHIFT from fear to love. Thanks Gabby. If you practice enough, and turn your face to love-based feelings, decisions, relationships etc, you can never go wrong. It doesn’t matter what you believe in. Love always wins. And that is what Spirit is. Love. Easy peasy.
Now that I have made the choice to look at my shadow-side (because we all have one) it’s kinda pretty messy here. In this place, I know there are some beliefs I need to expend, some pretty hard life choices I need to look at and of course, there’s the past decisions that I made that had catastrophic effects on the ones I love. Looking at those everyday. Feeling and digging in the crap. But it’s all necessary. It would hurt more to keep doing what I was doing. It would feel MORE uncomfortable to keep trucking along and just living with it. It is more freeing to forgive myself and that person than it is to hold onto it. I meet so many clients who are mirrors of me. That me I used to be. I hear their stories and I yell, “OMG ME TOO!! That happened to me! I did that too!!” It’s the best part of this journey, really. Because now I know I am not alone. They truly do inspire me to speak my own truth. Looking at the shadow side is SO liberating. I know that joy is just around the corner. If it isn’t for you, make the decision to do the work. Decide enough is enough and you’re tired of feeling this way. It’s been too long. And when you decide to look at it, I will hand you that t-shirt that says: “I am SO Spiritual”. Because now you get it.
Need someone to believe in you? I am transitioning my Mediumship business into Spiritual Coaching.
Maybe it’s time for a new email 😉